Woman
by Sandra Miller
I am an artist, a co-creator with the Holy Creator. Indeed, when I am making art, and most especially when I am pulling sheets of handmade paper, I am immersed in a quiet form of prayer that is inclusive of heart, mind, body, and soul. It is a time I feel whole, loved, and connected to the network of all life. And so begins the story you are reading.
My process is to take the elements, the individual pieces of paper I’ve made, and literally play with them until what I deem an assembled piece of sculpture has emerged. That isn’t the end, as I live with every piece for several days, until I am sure that it is what it is supposed to be—I want each sculpture to talk to me, both esthetically and volubly. I also want each piece to talk to viewers in their own language.
Woman. 2019. Abaca fiber and basket reed.
Woman was made and fitted together in 2019, and it took time for me to recognize her for what she was – the essence of the female form, and a vehicle for my own inner journey.
There is some irony in the materials used for Woman. Parts of the piece are made from two batches of paper pulp of different colors. Woman’s upper body is a neutral beige and could represent a woman of any ethnic or racial background. Her lower body representation, her vital reproductive organs, are a subtle green tone, which comes from green egg cartons made of 50% grass and 50% recycled paper. Both batches of paper pulp are primarily made of abaca fiber, which naturally shrinks in the drying process. That shrinkage causes the fiber to adapt to the pieces of arced basket reed between the two layers of paper. This creates the luscious curvature over which I have little control, but which is so emblematic, to me, of woman writ large. This is not unlike the give and take of life – we stretch and shrink in so many ways.
As I write this essay, my daughter is just weeks away from her 54th birthday, and I am two months away from my 73rd. If you do the math, you will discern that I was 18 when I got pregnant. I was naïve, devoid of a support system, had empty pockets, and was scared out of both my mind and spirit. Abortion was illegal, and I had no idea how to connect to anyone who could point me in the right direction. I gave my daughter up for adoption as the only viable choice. Much else was given up because of my own decisions and circumstances, yet my daughter and I have been reunited as friends for almost 33 years, and I have a wonderful “son-in law” and two wonderful grandsons, ages 22 and 20.
Before Lauren and I met as adults, I often wondered how my life would have been different had I not gotten pregnant, or if I’d had an abortion, or if I’d been able to pursue a college education. Since then, I have had many journeys, in large part made possible by the foundation of love that my grandmother provided. I lost my place in the structure of Judaism, though I hung onto the core of the goodness we can be and pursue in the world, and through many years and experiences found my way back to the Holy One through Jesus, with the help of many dear friends along the way. I am so much stronger than I have ever been, and I found my voice in my art, in the community of Seekers Church, and in a number of justice-seeking communities.
Woman was made prior to the Dobbs decision and has become a vehicle for deep dives into faith journeys related to justice since then. She was donated to Justice Arts Coalition for a fundraising exhibition/sale, and happily was sold to benefit this important nonprofit engaged in justice for incarcerated artists, a place of engagement for me. And, now I confess that, in light of the Dobbs decision, I am sorrowful that she is no longer in my own possession as a tangible vehicle for reflection on how I take action on behalf of women’s dominion over their own bodies, and on every inclusive justice issue. I believe in a woman’s right to choose, and have been for 54 years.
Woman is wall hung and casts numerous shadows depending on the direction of the light source. My hope is that viewing Woman invites whomever and wherever the viewers are into an evolving relationship with the fact that every woman is constantly changing, and all women are constantly evolving, dependent upon the direction and strength of light and the attention afforded them.
Sandra Miller is a transplant to the DMV from California, drawn by the community of Seekers Church, which provides a loving and encouraging community in support of her call to co-creation with the Holy One through art-making and working for a just world. She is a paper artist, gardener, the founder of of the Interfaith Sacred Conversation on Race & Diversity, and a pen pal to six incarcerated artists.
